What's our purpose...

I have no clue anymore. I thought I was here to be a good person and to take care of my husband and family. It seems all I do is get griped and or get ignored. I can't do anything right some days and I try so hard. I work 40 hours a week to try and help provide, try and get my homework done while trying to keep the house clean, make sure Cody does his homework and cook supper and plan meals. It's so hard when my husband works 50+ hours a week and us so tired and cranky and I feel lonely and left out. He makes me feel like I'm bothering him when I talk to him. He's either on the phone or watching TV. I'm tired too, but I still have to get up and do what needs to be done. I just want to spend time with him and it's so hard when he's in a bad mood. He looks angry ALL the time. I'm scared to talk to him sometimes. I reach over at night while he's asleep and pray for God to be with him and help him. I ask God to protect him and let him know how much I love him. I pray for all of us. All of the kids, granddaughter, in-laws, everyone. I want us to be happy again. I don't want to be afraid. I just need peace and a little love. Is that too much to ask?

New Year

This is the perfect time to thank God for all our blessings. Thank you Lord.

Feeling positive...

Ok, gotta keep going. This is getting better for us. We are happy. This is the last weekend jail for Tommy. I'm so happy. I just wish I could talk to him or schedule a visit. Sux. But, he will be home soon. Then, he has permission from the landlord to fix the leak since the plumber said it was too difficult to fix. Either way, we have a plan and we know God is encouraging us to keep going. Cody is even being positive about all this. I'm glad we can come together and pray and talk about things. We are going to make it. I love these guys. We will not give up...

God bless.

Still swimming...

I'm at a loss right now. I have been trying to keep it together all day and I'm about to break. If it is not one thing it's 20. When are things gonna go my way again? I thought we were going in the right direction and doing good. I'm praising God for all of our blessings, I'm praying, I'm trying. What happened?  Our refrigerator went out, we had to get a new water meter, now we have a water leak and Tommy is not here to fix it. I'm lost here. I can't do all of this myself. Tommy is at weekend jail and I can't talk to him because the jail lost my phone deposit money. I can't schedule a time to see him because their website is retarded and I can't schedule one in person because it's too late. I'm pissed. I am praying amd trying not to lose it right now. I know God is with me. I just want to talk to my husband. He knows what to say to help me. Please pray we make it. I know other people have bigger problems. I know I can handle ours, one step at a time.

Cody's first day of High School ruined

So upset. Cody's first day of high school is ruined by a person who tried to bully me around and threaten me. She won't threaten my husband to his face but threaten to send him to prison to me to torture me. She has threatened me for the last time with her LIES. I'M TIRED OF HEARING GET LIES!! That is all that comes out of her mouth. She threatened to kill me today. All her nasty voicemails and horrific texts will make a good laugh when it is over but right now I'm sick. I am just tired of people running over me and thinking they are better than me. She needs to stop and realize the situation before she opens her mouth. And to call me a lazy day bitch is uncalled for. Man, I wian she would take a gander in the mirror. It may show her the truth. I know that people who are unhappy try very hard to make others unhappy to make them feel better. I have been praying for her, my husband, my son and for myself to keep calm and let this blow over. I will not be talked to like that. She will continue to be hung up on and her texts ignored if she continues to act that way. I will not let her talk to me or my family like that. I'm done with this devil of a person. There is no forgiveness unless God Himself has me forgive this person. My husband is standing behind me 100 percent and I am standing behind him the same. I don'tknow why people have to lie and threaten people. It makes me sick. It literally makes me sick. My blood pressure is way high right now and I have a massive headache and I want to throw up. This has got to stop. I am done with this person even though they are my husband's family. He has had told me that after today we will not have anything to do with her since she has threatened our family. I am ranting out my frustrations since she ruined my son's first day. She threatened to come up there to the school to assault me and kill me. I swear. I pray that she can live with her actions. I pray for all in this situation and pray noone is hurt more than they are now.  We can survive this. God is in our side. God bless.

Looking for Lovely | Read an Excerpt a Playlist!

I am going to read this excerpt. Love the cover.  Wanted to share because I'm excited and hungry for God.

Looking for Lovely | Read an Excerpt a Playlist!: We’re so excited about the new Looking for Lovely Bible study by Annie F. Downs! You may have seen and even read the book by the same name. The Bible study dives deeper into the biblical resp…

Patience...

I am really in need of some patience.  I am sitting here singing the Guns 'N Roses song. "Just a little patience, yeah yeah"  I guess it kind of calms me down.  It just gets me to singing that song anyways. Right now I don't have much patience left.  I am trying not to lose my temper and not get mad over every little thing.  It is hard for me not to say some things and hard for me to ask for help and point out the obvious.  I really really appreciate the help I have been receiving and want so much to be able to pay them back and not have that hanging over my head each day.  

Tommy tells me not to worry too much about it, but I really do worry about and I hate to even hint or ask for help.  Now I have gone and asked all of my family for help. Now no one is jumping up to help.  I cannot even get a response from my messages, either voice or text or even Facebook messaging. Am I that bad?  Have I burned my bridges?  I did not think that I have been asking too much of them.  My aunt has helped me a few times the last two weeks since I have had technical issues with my PayPal.  Thanks to her, I could get a few sales calls done and make a few bucks.  I really, really need help to make this work since I think we are down to the last leg of this journey.

I am really excited that I got an offer from United Supermarkets.  I really wanted the job and had my second interview yesterday.  It will be paying more per hour starting out since I have experience.  I got another call today and got a job offer from Driveline and I think I'm gonna take it.  It pays $2.00 an hour more than the United job's starting pay.  But, I really would rather do the merchandising job and really would like the freedom and the flexibility and even more money an hour.  I am super excited and thank God for this.  I am trying to get my life together and really want this opportunity.  The Lord had been with me and my family and now is the test and more and more positive things are going to happen.  I just need to keep on track and keep going.  I'm so proud and cannot wait to tell Tommy about it and since I cannot talk to him right now, I can tell him when I go see him in the morning.  I am super excited and can't wait until we leave to go see him.  Man, I guess I need to get some sleep so I can get up and get ready in the morning.

Good night and God bless!!!