Life is hard for a lot of people...

I seem to be whining a lot lately. I am not giving up.  I am just so tired of all of the people that think they know what is going on.  Now when I tell you what is going on, that is what is actually happening. Don't try to judge us and put what you thought was going on into the mix.  Because that only going to piss me off more.  I am doing my damnest to keep what I have and keep going to take care of my son and do what my husband wishes while he is incarcerated.  Now you people that are sticking your nose in and profiling can just go away.  I am not going to stoop to your level and answer your stupid questions.  I will not text you back if you ask me anymore dumb questions which you should know the answer to.  I HAVE NOT been using and AM NOT using methamphetamines right now.  So, if you think you know what is going on in my life, YOU DON'T!!!!!  

So, that is what is happening today folks.  If you want to know something, yes, ask me, but I have already been over this with you and already told everyone the same shit over and over and over.  I am just so tired of the bullshit and having to repeat myself.  Tommy is not having a fun time in jail and I am doing my damnest to raise money BY MYSELF AND GET ANOTHER JOB.  I will not ask for help except to put money on Tommy's phone or on our phones so we can communicate.  Right now he has money on his books and we have a place to stay and money on our phones for a couple of weeks.  If anyone wants to help, they can put money on the phone for him or I am taking a collection to pay the bail-bond person, whoever I choose, to bond him out.  

Now, if that is just too much,  I guess we will be cutting our ties to a lot more people than we thought.  Tommy and I already have cut a lot of ties to people who we thought were our friends.  I now have only 3 friends in my life that are Tommy's and that are doing what they can for me.  Also, I have one of his cousins and one of his siblings that are willing to help.  Now, I have no family at the moment.  My family and I are not communicating due to this also.  They are hypocrites just like Tommy's family.  They want you to do what they think is right and they do not see that they are also doing what we have been doing.  They are also drug addicts, alcoholics and etc. just like us, but are not willing to admit it.  I am getting really tired of all of the hypocrites that think they will not be found out.  Now listen, it is not my job to tell anyone.  I am sitting back and letting everyone know my story so that they can know that there is someone else out there that has been through it.  I am not trying to get sympathy in any way, I am just trying to tell my side of the story.  My son knows about this and he is OK with it.  I am just trying to make sure MY VOICE is being heard too.

Thanks for listening...

God Bless, I have to do what my husband and I discussed:  I am taking it to the WAR ROOM and I am going into battle.

Good Night!!!

Our way...

Saturday:  I am now in love with my husband more than ever. He did something so out of the ordinary.  I am so proud of him. He decided to pick his family over his habit.  I am so happy and he makes me so happy. We had a chance to go to a party and he turned the car around and decided that we would not go.  

Sunday:  Had a wonderful day at church.  The sermon was excellent and very informative and engaging.  I love how our Preacher preaches.  Now, that evening was not perfect, but we take the good times with the bad I guess.

Monday:  I know the power of God was working Saturday afternoon because he turned the car around and we came home and spent time with our son and his mom and step-dad.  We played dominoes and played music.  We had even stopped to get a six-pack of beer to celebrate since I was so excited and he was too.  I cannot express how I was so happy and just felt like a chain had been taken off or released.  Now, what I meant by the power of God at work earlier is that while we were headed down the road to go that way, I was playing a game on my laptop and suddenly felt really sleepy.  Well, I told my husband that I was going to close my eyes for a bit (well, it was the Holy Spirit making me keep my mouth shut and let him concentrate and have that war with his good and evil to make a good decision). I understood that afterwards.  Well, it felt like I had been asleep for about an hour and in reality, it had only been about 10 minutes or less.  I awoke to him turning the car around in the bar-ditch and I was so confused.  I saw that where we had turned there was road construction, but it did not dawn on me what was going on.  I asked him if the road was closed.  Well, with a look on his face that is indescribable, he told me no and that we were going home.  Well, at first I was just trying to figure out what the heck was going on. Then, it dawned on me that we were not going to go to that party and mess up and back-slide on what I had been trying so hard not to do.  He talks about it all the time and it really infuriates me.  But, I do not say anything and just try to let it go and let him talk it out.  Now granted I don't feel as though it has the same pull on me, but in a way I know it has to and that we all have to deal with addiction in our own way.  We have been very honest with our son and I tell him everything that I think he needs to know and try to use as much of this as a teaching tool for a learning moment so that he understands later when he is faced with these issues.  The devil with try anything and I intend to educate my son so that he can be prepared to wage that war with evil and win.  Like our preacher says about the Bible, we know how it is going to end.  So, we know who wins...

Have a wonderful week!!!  God bless!!